Monday, September 10, 2007

The People vs. Britney Spears

We tried hard to believe that Britney Spears would blow us away in her opening performance at Sunday night's VMAs, and she did — for all the wrong reasons.

Britney took to the stage in a too-small bikini for her post-baby body with little of her trademark sass, and seemed to be walking through her "comeback" gig. So is it time to say goodbye to Spears as a songstress? Here's what the people had to say:

“Her performance was really bad. She couldn’t even lip-synch. It’s tragic! Britney needs to give it up,” said Mara Yanoshik, 21, of New York.

“I wanted to cry for her. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. MTV should be ashamed of themselves for giving her the opening act, especially as Chris Brown was unreal,” said Lisa Jackson, 25, of New Jersey.

“I honestly don't think it was as awful as everyone is saying — she just seemed nervous. Yeah, she wasn’t tiny like she was as a teen, but she looked hot for a mom with two young kids. I mean, she's gone through a lot. People need to cut her some slack,” said Jill Bernett, 32, Australia.

“I can’t wait to read what all the weeklies have too say … something is so wrong with her. What was she thinking, wanting to wear that little outfit? That was a turn-off. Gross,” said Holly Wehlan-Brown, 17, of Ohio.

“She wasn’t exactly talented in the first place. Hopefully now she’ll go hide somewhere and we can focus on real news,” said Adam Jones, 38, of New York.

“Oh yeah, I loved it — we watched it over and over. Haven’t laughed that hard in ages. I don’t want to her to give up — that would be boring," said Ross Elliot, 23, of California.

“I have no sympathy for her — she was way bad. She didn’t even try — my dog could have done better,” said Nicola Wu, 20, of California.

“What happened to her hair? Those weaves were horrible. She looked so scared, the poor thing, she seems to lack so much confidence and so much pressure was put on her over this … She’s still got it in her to be a good performer, the song is fun and catchy,” said Kylie Kothari, 34, of Nevada.

“She was having an out-of-body experience I think. I don’t think Brit was really there at all. Someone has taken our Spears!” said Joe Rizeri, 25, of Florida.

“It’s no wonder Criss Angel was a disappearing act. He didn’t want to be associated with that …that comedy act. Goodbye, Britney,” said Davina Jones, 21, of Maryland.

Paris Blows Christina's Cover

Paris Hilton took to the microphone on Saturday at the new LAX club and happily congratulated the “gorgeous” Christina Aguilera on her pregnancy. Oops! As far as the public is concerned, the pop princess isn’t officially expecting.

Christina and hubby Jordan both did a jaw-drop. … We wonder if any “Dirrrty” words were exchanged in that DJ booth.

Last week, we learned that Hilton is prepping for pregnancy, and it seems the perennial party girl has already picked out baby names.

The hotel heiress has confessed to wanting a mini-me under the title of Paris Junior, but is also a fan of the British badge London. Why? She once had a cat named after the royal city.

And after months of speculation that Hilton’s famous dog Tinkerbell had mysteriously disappeared, is pleased to announce that the puny pup was spotted sunbathing last weekend in the Hamptons with the more mature Hilton heirs.

Thriller: John Legend Bringing MJ Back?

R&B sensation John Legend “couldn’t get enough” of pop prince Michael Jackson as a child, and has confessed to modeling himself on the Moonwalker.

Now, there's buzz that John is going to bring back his "Legend."

“John just thinks that Michael has too much talent too give it all away now,” an insider close to the star splurged to “They work really well together and are both creative geniuses. What they can do is mind-blowing — it will send the music world into a spin.”

Meanwhile, Legend is set to headline a private performance at TV Guide’s Annual Emmys After-Party on Sunday. And Lindsay Lohan’s gal pal DJ Samantha Ronson is set to spin away from her new role as the door host at Hyde just to jam with John at Les Deux.

Lingerie Label Wooing Britney Spears

The days of Britney Spears and her panty-free parading may finally be over, as has learned that the “Crazy” crooner is contemplating a contract with a leading lingerie label.

“A pretty prominent underwear company is very interested in having Britney exclusively endorse their line,” an insider close to the pop princess told Pop Tarts.

“At this stage the deal probably won’t involve any official advertising, but she’ll be required only to wear their products, and I guess somehow she’ll have to work out a way to show those cotton coverings!”

The source added that there are few things that would need to be “ironed out” with the Britster before blanketing her booty with a brand, including formalities to forbid future flesh-flashing.

“It would look really bad if she was caught again without underpants, especially when she has a top lingerie label backing her, so they’ll want to ensure that doesn’t happen,” added the insider.

Perhaps this is another personal push for Brit to get back into the spotlight “One More Time." The “reformed” rehabber is reportedly also working hard to drop some pounds.

“It’s been a stressful time for Britney and she has gained weight,” confirmed a Britney buddy. “But now that she’s on the comeback trail, she’s determined to get back into shape. She’ll be doing a lot more dance classes and she’s given up alcohol.”

But Brit may also be getting some help from Hoodia, with a number of reports suggesting that Spears recently had a big box of the African appetite suppressants home-delivered.

Lauren Conrad Is a One-Word Woman

It's a good thing that “The Hills” hottie Lauren Conrad has a sweet smile and a figure to be envied, because when it comes to publicity, the reality star is a little lost for words.

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